The sun will come up... But not for long.

I try to be a positive person. I try really hard. People think that it's just me, I'm naturally perky. What they don't know is the internal battle I am constantly fighting in order to appear that way on the outside. I don't want to say that I've had a hard life, because overall, I am a very blessed person. But after saying that, I must say that I've had to deal with more trauma in the last 7 years than most people have to deal with in a lifetime. Much of it is my own fault. I got myself in some really bad situations and I have worked really, really hard to fix the wrongs that I have done, and to overcome the wrongs that have been done to me. I think that I have made amazing changes, and I am proud of myself for having the will power to change. The thing that I'm having a hard time with now, is that just when things seem to start going right, something happens. Always. I can have a good couple weeks, sometimes even a good month or two. But then without fail, I am put back in my place. It really feels like there is something out there that is trying to keep me from being truly happy. Maybe it's a lost memory that I need to deal with before I can get to that point or maybe it's just my fate to deal with all of the trauma that others aren't strong enough to handle. I don't know, but I need a break. I need just one thing to go right, and stay that way. At least for a little while. Is it too much to ask to have a small bit of peace? I know that I am strong person, but I can feel my strength slipping. And I'm not sure how much longer I will be able to keep holding on.

I'm sorry that this post is such a downer, but I really needed to vent for a moment.

I Can't Think of Anything Clever.

Wow, what a long year. Overall it was great! I met some great people, got rid of some not-so-great 'friends', and had a lot of fun! Following in last years footsteps, here is a list of my more memorable moments throughout the year:



January - Cessation of My Unhealthy Habit



February - Vegas Baby!



March - The Great Escape



April - Arggh...



May - Bad Ideas...; Pic-a-nic Summer Lovin'



June - Hello again, parents house...



July - Vegas Con La Familia



August - Welcome to Adulthood, Andrea!



September - Attack of the Kidneys.



October - Expelliarmus!



November - Avast! Yea nasty Swine!



December - Deception of the Arscholoch

Bucket List

Life should not be taken for granted... I was lucky to learn this early on in life. I would prefer to have learned this lesson an easier way than I did, but I truly believe there is a reason for everything and I plan to make the most of it. Since my last eye opening experience regarding how fragile our existence is, I have been making a bucket list, and trying to accomplish them all early in life.

• Ride A Horse
• Go Bungee Jumping
• Sky Dive
• Go Fishing
• Go Cliff Jumping
• Four Wheeling
• Snow-Mobiling
• Go to an Opera
• Visit New York
• Visit relatives in Denmark
• Drive a boat
• Visit as many countries as possible
• Start my own business
• Become a mother (whether through adoption or naturally)
• Make a difference in someones life
• Publish a book
• Find my soul mate

This is really all that I can think of right a this moment. But I plan to add to this as I think of other things. You never know when your time will be over, so I plan to check things off of this list at my earliest possible convenience. And I hope that you all will appreciate the life that you have and begin listening to your heart as well as your head.

+1s and then some.

It's hard to be single around the holidays. I would much rather be single on Valentine's Day. On V-Day, it doesn't really matter if you have no one to share it with. It's an incredibly commercial-ized, ridiculous holiday that I think some needy woman came up with to try and make her man be romantic. Anyway, as I was saying. It's worse than usual this year, I have multiple weddings dinners and parties that I have been invited to. And they all ask if I have a +1... So, since I don't have a man that I have wrapped around my finger and thus they are required to go, I really have to think about the question. Who will be at the party? How many will be single? Are the couples who will be there the awkward type? Should I ask someone to be my +1? If I ask someone, do I ask just a friend? Or do I ask someone that I am interested in? If I just ask a guy friend, will he think that it means more?


I know that seems like a lot of questions, some unnecessary, but I sadly have unknowingly led men on in the past. I don't know what it is, but some men tend to misinterpret my friendliness as interest. And in one situation, I chose to ignore the signs of him falling for me, because I was being selfish and wanted attention. But that's a whole different blog post... maybe.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~



I know that this photo has nothing to do with this blog post... But I was looking for the perfect picture to accompany my word vomit, and I stumbled upon this beauty. What better to catch word vomit that an eco-potty?







I don't think that anything could possibly top an eco-potty in this blog post, so I will bid you adieu.

Happy traaaaaiiiiilllllls to yoooooooouuuuuuuuuuu, until we meet again...

Six Things I Want To Smack With A Tree

I was in SLC with two of my FAVORITE gals ever, Alicia and Heather. And we decided to grab some pizza at The Pie. First of all, we are a strange bunch. We decided on a half and half pizza to suit all of our many tastes... what were the two halves you ask? Xtreme Veggie and Mountain of Meat. We quite enjoyed ordering that one. And it was DELICIOUS! Anywho... while waiting for our pizza to cook, I began to read one of the periodicals that was sitting in the waiting area. One of the articles has inspired me. It was regarding the author's top ten people and things she wants to punch in the face. My favorite on her list : West Virginia. No explanation necessary. So anyway, I frequently want to punch things in the face. Well... I usually say I want to smack them with a tree... but it's close enough right? So here is my list.

November - I know that I am supposed to be thankful during November because of the pilgrims and crap, but I HATE November. Too much togetherness and family stuff... Chontel + Busy + Family = FREAK OUT!

Juvenile Sex Offenders - Not only have they committed heinous crimes, they act like WE owe THEM something... "Woe is me, life is so hard, this place sucks, these rules are ridiculous..." STFU! The RIDICULOUS thing is that you were a sex offender before the age of 15.

Close Minded People - Living in a small-ish dominantly Mormon community exposes me to many different types of zealots. They all should be smacked with a tree. Why can't you just live and let live. There is a difference between sharing your beliefs with others, and stomping all over someone elses beliefs because you don't agree.

Tom Cruise - He is the definition of Napolean Complex. I have actually enjoyed some of the movies that I have seen of his, he's a pretty good actor... But OMG I can't stand the guy. I can count the number of his movies that I've watched on one hand. And I don't plan to increase that number.

Welfare Abusers - I am all for assistance for the needy, but I am SO against assistance for the lazy and manipulative. My mother told me the story of someone who worked on her car in an emergency... He actually told her that he was just waiting for his friends unemployment to run out, then it's his turn to work while this guy stays at home. Seriously??? Stop being a lazy ass, and earn your keep! Another thing that bugs me.... I really think that in order to get welfare you should have to pass a drug test. I have to be able to pass one in order to work, so YOU should have to pass one in order to get welfare. I think it's only fair. Why is this NOT a current practice?

Sickness - My body likes to screw with me. True, I have been getting more healthy as I get older... But I still get these ridiculous illnesses that last what seems like forever. Case in point: Early October I was stricken with an excruciatingly painful kidney infection complete with a cyst the size of a golf ball in my ovary. Ouch. And then just last week, I thought that I had Bronchitis... nope. It was Swine Flu. Which wasn't so bad as long as I didn't walk at all and didn't try to talk. My family wouldn't even really speak to me. They would make me food and then leave it on the floor in front of my bedroom door. So you see... these are merely the sicknesses that I have experienced in the last month. Sickness DEFINITELY deserves to be smacked with a tree.

There was originally going to be a list of ten things that I want to smack with a tree. But it was taking too long. I don't like thinking about things I dislike. I was going to format the text more too, but I didn't feel like it. Haha.. Blog'd.