Contentment

Lately everything important has been going just how I want it to. I got the position I wanted at work, some medical tests I've gotten finally came back normal(after 6 years of issues), I have great friends, and my relationship with my family is strong. Life is good. I would even go so far as to say that it's great. And that right there scares the hell out of me. My life has never been great. Great things may happen sometimes, and my life has been good, but it's never great. I wish that I could just accept that my life is finally turning around and that all of the bad is behind me, but I can't. I'm sitting here in the middle of my great life, and I'm just waiting, trying to brace myself for it all to be ripped away. I know that a lot of the things that happened in the past are because of choices I've made. And I know that I have matured and learned and I won't make those same choices. But I still can't shake that thought in the corner of my mind telling me that the better things seem, the farther there is to fall. And, in my experience, it always falls. Maybe I'm just jaded and I need to learn to accept when things are good and not worry about what may happen. It's easier said than done. I will try my hardest to enjoy it while it lasts, and hopefully it lasts for a long long time.